Canine Quotes

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"She is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog/cat. You are her life, her love, her leader. She will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of her heart. You owe it to her to be worthy of such devotion." - (unknown)

"Chihuahua. There's a waste of dog food. Looks like a dog that is still far away." --Billiam Coronell

Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He wanted to get a long little doggie...... "

"Tis sweet to hear the watch-dog's honest bark Bay deep-mouth'd welcome as we draw near home; 'Tis sweet to know there is an eye will mark Our coming, and look brighter when we come." -Lord Byron

"The fastest dogs in the world live in Siberia, because the trees are so far apart...."

"A dog's best friend is his illiteracy" - Ogden Nash

"Man is a dog's idea of what God should be." - Holbrook Jackson

"So many get reformed by religion. I got reformed through dogs" -Lina Basquette

"Every dog should have a man of his own. There is nothing like a well-behaved person around the house to spread the blanket for him, or bring him his supper when he comes home man-tired at night" - Corey Ford

"Dogs love company. They place it first in their short list of needs." - J.R. Ackerly

"Never judge a dog's pedigree by the kind of books he does not chew." -Anonymous

"Take a dog for a companion and a stick in your hand." -English Proverb

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FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG...LOOKS LIKE A RAT...BEEN OUT AWHILE...BETTER BE A REWARD.

How come a dog hates it when you blow in its face, but hangs its head out the window when you are driving?

Why do firehouses have dalmatians?

How do you KNOW it's new and improved dog food?

If dogs didn't have fur would we still pet them?

If a dog sweats through his tongue, why does he have armpits?

If you spill spot remover on a dalmatian, will it's spots disappear?

Why is it that when dogs are soaking wet, they wait until they' right next to you before they shake?

Why is a dog so jumpy if you lightly touch its tail, yet it feels nothing when it bangs it repeatedly on the kitchen table?

Since GOD spelled backwards is DOG, does that make my pet dog Satan?

If you named your dog "Stay" and you taught him to obey your commands, what would the dog do if you said "Come, Stay."?

Water in the southern hemisphere turns around counter-clockwise before going down the drain. Do dogs in the southern hemisphere turn around counter-clockwise before they lie down?

What does "how come" mean?

Is it a command for a dog named How, to come?

If I throw a stick away, I don't want it. Why does my dog always bring it back?

If you could teach an old dog new tricks, who would care?

Surely not the dog?

Can a dog wag it's tail backwards?

If so, how would we know?

If a dog's bark is worse than his bite, why don't hospitals have to report dog bark wounds?

When you give water to the dog, you say you watered the dog. So if you give milk to the cat, have you milked the cat?

Is there any tree too big for a short dog to lift his leg on?

Do Police Dogs get free doughnuts too?

Why is it that when my dog yawns at me it makes me yawn, but when I yawn at him, he doesn't yawn?

Why do people say they are sicker than a dog?

Since when are dogs so sick?

Why don't they make dog biscuits that taste like a mailman's leg?

  "Dogs are our link to paradise. They don't know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring--it was peace." -- Milan Kundera

He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of suchdevotion." -- Author Unknown

If a [person] be great even his dog will wear a proud look. --Mohandas Gandhi

"The martial strains have summoned me to hear your sorrows, still your pain. I am the protector of Justice; equality-my sole friend. My vision never blurred by cowardice,  my soul never chained.   Life without honor is life in vain.  I am the dog."

  "Always look out for number one, and be careful not to step in number two." --Rodney Dangerfield

  "In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him." --Dereke Bruce, Taipei, Taiwan

"Of all the things I miss from veterinary practice, puppy breath is one of the most fond memories!" --Dr. Tom Cat

"There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face." --Ben Williams

"When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem." --Edward Abbey

"Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it." --Unknown

"Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail."--Unknown

"No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does." --Christopher Morley

"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself." --Josh Billings

"Man is a dog's idea of what God should be." --Holbrook Jackson

"The average dog is a nicer person than the average person." --Andrew A. Rooney

"He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion." --Unknown

"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man."            --Mark Twain

"Things that upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great Dane."--Smiley Blanton

"I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts." --John Steinbeck

"The problem of cat versus bird is as old as time.  If we attempt to resolve it by legislation, who know but what we may be called upon to take sides as well in the age-old problems of dog versus cat, bird versus bird, or even bird versus worm."

I'm not too fond of "nature red in tooth and claw" (Tennyson) but it's a fact. We deal with it however we can but to blame the animal for being what it is is unrealistic.---Governor of IL, Adlai Stevenson, 1949.

"A dog wags its tail with its heart" -- Martin Buxbaum

"Dogs are our link to paradise. They don't know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring--it was peace." -- Milan Kundera

 "If you can't decide between a Shepherd, a Setter or a Poodle, get them all ... adopt a mutt!" -- ASPCA

"Even the tiniest Poodle or Chihuahua is still a wolf at heart."

• Dorothy Hinshaw Patent, Dogs: The Wolf Within

The Christian monk Xanthias once said: "A dog is better than I am, for he has love and does not judge."

  Q. What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?

A. After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

"Animals may be our friends, but they wont pick you up at the airport."--Bobcat Goldthwait

America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room.  Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. - Arnold Toynbee

"A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog's IQ. Here's how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you." --Jay Leno

 Poem for a New Puppy Owner

Don't smell crotches, Don't eat plants.

............submitted by Debbie Charneski

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