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without permission. We believe that all the listings, joke and quotes,
are in the public domain and not copywrited. Please email
us if you know differently.
"God... sat down for a moment when the dog was finished in order
to watch it... and to know that it was good, that nothing was lacking,
that it could not have been made better." - Rainer Maria Rilke
"They never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk
about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in
the conversation." - Jerome K. Jerome
"Bulldogs are adorable, with faces like toads that have been sat
on." - Colett
"We give them the love, the time we can spare. In return dogs have
given us, their absolute all, it is without a doubt, the best deal,
man has ever made." - Roger Caras
"Great Truths About Life That Little Children Have Learned"
- No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
- You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
- Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a tic-tac.
- Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.
"When a man's dog turns against him it is time for his wife to pack
her trunk and go home to mamma" - Mark Twain
"Old age means realizing you will never own all the Basset Hounds
you hoped to." - Helen Hendricks
Acquiring a dog may be the only opportunity human ever has to choose
a relative. - Mordecai Siegal
"Knowing how to use your voice so it makes sense to your dog, using
words in a way your dog can understand, correcting him without creating
fear, praising him properly, and doing it all at the proper time
are critical skills to develop if your dog is to learn from you."
- Brian Kilcommons
"It is fatal to let any dog know she is funny, for she immediately
loses her head and starts hamming it up." - P.G. Wodehouse
"I think we are drawn to dogs because they are the uninhibited creatures
we might be if we weren't certain we knew better." - George Bird
Evans
"No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation
as the dog does." - Christopher Morley
"I know that dogs are pack animals, but it's difficult to imagine
a pack of standard poodles . . . and if there was such a thing as
a pack of standard poodles, where would they rove to? Bloomingdales?"
- Yvonne Clifford
"Folk will know how large your soul is, by the way you treat a dog!"
- Charles F. Doran
"I wonder what goes through his mind when he sees us peeing in his
water bowl." - Penny Ward Moser
"Ever consider what they must think of us? I mean, here we come
back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul- chicken, pork,
half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!"
- Anne Tyler
"You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person
with pets." - Nora Ephron
"Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should relax
and get used to the idea." - Robert A. Heinlein
"In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone
should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore
him." - Dereke Bruce
"Cat's Motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make
it look like the dog did it." - Unknown
"He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are
his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true,
to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of
such devotion" - Unknown
"I care not for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better
for it." - Abraham Lincoln
"If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where
they went." - Unknown
"Things that upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great
Dane." - Smiley Blanton
"I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed
contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are
nuts." - John Steinbeck
"My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child.
We can't decide whether to ruin our carpets or ruin our lives."
- Rita Rudner
"Men cannot think like dogs... (there is) a sharp difference in
the mental capacity of humans and canines. For example, a human
who is given an intricate problem will spend all day trying to solve
it, but a canine will have the sense to give up and do something
else instead." - Cory Ford
"A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around
three times before lying down." - Robert Benchley
EPITAPH TO A DOG
His friends he loved. His fellest earthly foes--
Cats--I believe he did but feign to hate.
My hand will miss the insinuated nose,
Mine eyes that tail that wagged contempt at Fate.
- Sir William Watson
INSCRIPTION ON THE MONUMENT OF A NEWFOUNDLAND DOG
Near this spot are deposited the remains of one who
possessed Beauty without Vanity,
Strength without Insolence,
Courage without Ferocity,
and all the Virtues of Man,
without his Vices.
This Praise, which would be unmeaning
Flattery if inscribed over human
ashes is but a just tribute to the Memory
of Boatswain, a Dog.
- Lord Byron
If more of us were like dogs, we'd be better off. - Jay Dickey
Cats are smarter than dogs. You can not get eight cats to pull a
sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez
If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but
if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer.
- Alfred North Whitehead
I spilled spot remover on my dog. He's gone now. - Steven Wright
I named my dog "Stay"... so I can say "Come here, Stay. Come here,
Stay." - Steven Wright
Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the
car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at
nothing right in your ear. - Dave Barry
The dog was created specially for children. He is the god of frolic.
- Henry Ward Beecher
The great pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself
with him and not only will he not scold you but he will make a fool
of himself too. - Samuel Butler
To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity
of dogs. - Aldous Huxley
Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think
that is how dogs spend their lives. - Sue Murphy
Histories are more full of examples of the fidelity of dogs than
of friends. - Alexander Pope
Do not make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans or they
will treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott
Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of
his tail. - Henry Wheeler Shaw
Every dog must have his day. - Jonathan Swift
I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who have not got
the guts to bite people themselves. - August Strindberg
I have always thought of a dog lover as a dog that was in love with
another dog. - James Thurber
Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find
a rock. - Will Rogers
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not
bite you. This is the principle difference between a dog and a man.
- Mark Twain
Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still
be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement - Snoopy
If we value
the pursuit of knowledge, we must be free to follow wherever that
search may lead us. The free mind is not barking dog, to be tethered
on a ten-foot chain. - Adlai E. Stevenson Jr.
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